i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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