Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
