i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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