Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
she woke up with a sticky ear
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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