Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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