Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
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The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
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why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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