you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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