I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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