Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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