When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 607 share tweet
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize