I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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