i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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