well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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