What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
