u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
you made out with another girl for some wings
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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