you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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