I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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