I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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