Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
