if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
