I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize