oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
