I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Threesome in a minivan. New low
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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