her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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