I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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