You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
