try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
