Apparently you make a good broom.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Randomize
