Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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