Texts From Last Night

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  (561): View more from Florida

  I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.

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  (561): I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone. http://tfl.nu/li7n
  Replies (10) Good night (2287) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!

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  (813): why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?! http://tfl.nu/lcio
  Replies (26) Good night (782) Bad night (2229)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.

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  (775): Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk. (504): Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera. http://tfl.nu/hakn
  Replies (196) Good night (2030) Bad night (16724)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms

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  (412): as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms http://tfl.nu/8b7n
  Replies (24) Good night (3129) Bad night (905)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.

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  (425): I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie. http://tfl.nu/58ia
  Replies (12) Good night (5242) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.

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  (978): she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head. http://tfl.nu/uhfs
  Replies (7) Good night (4371) Bad night (1024)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times

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  (706): He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times http://tfl.nu/wnel
  Replies (12) Good night (8707) Bad night (1611)
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.

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  (980): when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space. http://tfl.nu/ayzt
  Replies (14) Good night (6052) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.

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  (414): He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after. http://tfl.nu/s41l
  Replies (8) Good night (3592) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?

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  (713): OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer? http://tfl.nu/g8wt
  Replies (13) Good night (799) Bad night (2404)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time

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  (816): Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time http://tfl.nu/d70u
  Replies (8) Good night (1294) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.

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  (978): Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on. http://tfl.nu/i5sb
  Replies (2) Good night (947) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?

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  (916): Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night? http://tfl.nu/oh7z
  Replies (5) Good night (1809) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.

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  (289): I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward. http://tfl.nu/nn3r
  Replies (4) Good night (388) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer

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  (214): Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer http://tfl.nu/w9ex
  Replies (3) Good night (493) Bad night (439)

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