You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
