Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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