ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
