So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Randomize
