wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
