Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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