Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
