I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Sober January is a disaster.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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