Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
You're a waste of cheezeits
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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