with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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