We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
