Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
