Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize