she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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