when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize