Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
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I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
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oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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