Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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