I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
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I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.