Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.

(818): View more from California

haha i love mojitos

(760): View more from California

ya and i hate cabbage

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(917): View more from New York City

i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.

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(917): View more from New York City

we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.

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(602): View more from Arizona

my dad is going to jail this weekend

(1-602): View more from Arizona

where are we going to get our weed from?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.

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(616): View more from Michigan

whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.

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(646): View more from New York

THAT'S MY GIRL

(646): View more from New York

KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED

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