He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
