I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize