Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
