he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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